Odds N' Ends...
As the summer draws to a close I find myself at a strange point (a nexus??). I am starring down an immense number of school related jobs (finishing my dissertation proposal, writing the five necessary essays and applications for internship, etc.), and I am reflecting upon the summer that has passed all too quickly.
The summer has not gone exactly as I had hoped. Leading into the season, I imagined myself working hard (as opposed to hardly working) on my paper-work. I thought that the normal incompetence at CSS would be replaced with some sort of efficiency in completing my full-time hire.
I also hoped for a truly memorable summer. The city was ‘supposed’ to reimburse me for my trip to Madrid. It did not. In fact- the bastards never truly said either yes or no. They simply stopped responding to the requests written my program director.
On the other hand, Cancun turned out to me far more fun than anticipated- despite a few solitary moments when I thought about who was not there. . .
Some friendships were breathed new life, while another was strangled by a bridezilla, turned wifezilla. . .
The weather was not what it was meant to be either. Nearly every weekend forecast was the same “rain”. And then there was more rain. . . My normal Mermaid Parade (aka, escape from daily reality) was a washout; as were attempts at BBQ after BBQ. It would have been nice to have the get-together, but when it’s called off- it’s off. Ya’ know?
Finally, one got off, without a hitch or a hiccup. I was glad for the people that were there. With the new propane grill fired up, there was chutney shrimp, seasoned turkey burgers, and yummy pasta salad. Everyone that was there was truly a part of the festivities, and proved that with minor direction, folks could really pull through for each other.
Even the annual smAlbany trip was a damp one. It’s always frustrating to be there without one of the girls, but science has not done its part: no flying cars, no cloned organs. Regardless, it was nice to chow down at an old favorite place with people close to me. It reminded me of a very lonely summer in the state’s capitol. And made me happier about where I was in my life these days.
Within days now, my roommate will be leaving for good, and taking her belongings with her. More than a year back, I thought it was time to break my increasingly neurotic habits, and stop my days of solitary living. Afforded a new perspective now, I know that having a system and being cleanly isn’t so awful. It makes quite a bit of sense to do many (although not all) of the things that I do.
And of relationships. . . To be happy with someone (although she may question me from time to time) is a leap from imagining me with the self-interested and emotionally closed-off people with whom I did imagine myself to be with.. Not being right all the time is more valuable then not being wrong all the time. Who would have thought that I would be the first one to suggest that we live together? And I’m glad we did rush things. I take tiny baby-steps in relationships. The trade-off is that I am pretty sure about my decisions when I make them.
I don’t’ know how much blogging I’ll be doing as I finally hunker down and do my work. But I’ll be around, wit the occasional wise-azz comment on the zonks. And even if I don’t post it, I’ll be grumbling about the inequities of the world, and the stupidity of people. And I’ll finish my work. And I’ll get that internship. And then my kiddies, I will be back- and with a little effort, faith and luck, things will be as good as they are today-
As the summer draws to a close I find myself at a strange point (a nexus??). I am starring down an immense number of school related jobs (finishing my dissertation proposal, writing the five necessary essays and applications for internship, etc.), and I am reflecting upon the summer that has passed all too quickly.
The summer has not gone exactly as I had hoped. Leading into the season, I imagined myself working hard (as opposed to hardly working) on my paper-work. I thought that the normal incompetence at CSS would be replaced with some sort of efficiency in completing my full-time hire.
I also hoped for a truly memorable summer. The city was ‘supposed’ to reimburse me for my trip to Madrid. It did not. In fact- the bastards never truly said either yes or no. They simply stopped responding to the requests written my program director.
On the other hand, Cancun turned out to me far more fun than anticipated- despite a few solitary moments when I thought about who was not there. . .
Some friendships were breathed new life, while another was strangled by a bridezilla, turned wifezilla. . .
The weather was not what it was meant to be either. Nearly every weekend forecast was the same “rain”. And then there was more rain. . . My normal Mermaid Parade (aka, escape from daily reality) was a washout; as were attempts at BBQ after BBQ. It would have been nice to have the get-together, but when it’s called off- it’s off. Ya’ know?
Finally, one got off, without a hitch or a hiccup. I was glad for the people that were there. With the new propane grill fired up, there was chutney shrimp, seasoned turkey burgers, and yummy pasta salad. Everyone that was there was truly a part of the festivities, and proved that with minor direction, folks could really pull through for each other.
Even the annual smAlbany trip was a damp one. It’s always frustrating to be there without one of the girls, but science has not done its part: no flying cars, no cloned organs. Regardless, it was nice to chow down at an old favorite place with people close to me. It reminded me of a very lonely summer in the state’s capitol. And made me happier about where I was in my life these days.
Within days now, my roommate will be leaving for good, and taking her belongings with her. More than a year back, I thought it was time to break my increasingly neurotic habits, and stop my days of solitary living. Afforded a new perspective now, I know that having a system and being cleanly isn’t so awful. It makes quite a bit of sense to do many (although not all) of the things that I do.
And of relationships. . . To be happy with someone (although she may question me from time to time) is a leap from imagining me with the self-interested and emotionally closed-off people with whom I did imagine myself to be with.. Not being right all the time is more valuable then not being wrong all the time. Who would have thought that I would be the first one to suggest that we live together? And I’m glad we did rush things. I take tiny baby-steps in relationships. The trade-off is that I am pretty sure about my decisions when I make them.
I don’t’ know how much blogging I’ll be doing as I finally hunker down and do my work. But I’ll be around, wit the occasional wise-azz comment on the zonks. And even if I don’t post it, I’ll be grumbling about the inequities of the world, and the stupidity of people. And I’ll finish my work. And I’ll get that internship. And then my kiddies, I will be back- and with a little effort, faith and luck, things will be as good as they are today-
